“The soul is neither male nor female. It is just a lover waiting to be reunited with the Beloved.”
As an artist, you chase moments that are visually stunning. But sometimes, you stumble upon moments that are spiritually silencing. My trip to Nandgaon, Uttar Pradesh, during the early days of my filming career, was exactly that. It wasn’t just a festival; it was a paradigm shift.
The Chaos of Color at Nand Baba Temple
The image above captures a fleeting second of eternity at the Nand Baba Temple. In the heart of North India—a society often defined by its patriarchal rigidity—I witnessed something that defied all social norms.
I saw men, draped in vibrant ghagras (skirts) and veils, twirling in ecstasy. This wasn’t a performance; it was a transformation.
This is the unique tradition of Lathmar Holi. Here, the men of Nandgaon (Krishna’s village) visit Barsana (Radha’s village) to tease the gopis, only to be playfully beaten with sticks (lath) by the women. But the ritual I witnessed went deeper. It was about Sakhi Bhaav—the sentiment that in the presence of the Divine Krishna, every soul is feminine. Every soul is a ‘Gopi’ longing for her Lord.
Radha, Krishna, and the Art of Unrequited Love
In the modern world, we look for “happily ever afters.” But in Braj (Vrindavan and Nandgaon), they celebrate the beauty of longing (viraha).
Radha and Krishna never married. Their love was not bound by the contracts of society; it was bound by the liberation of the soul. The festival of Holi here is a colorful manifestation of this eternal, unrequited love. It signifies that the ultimate goal of the mortal human (Radha) is not to “possess” the Divine (Krishna), but to dissolve into Him—like color dissolving into water.
When I filmed this dancer, I didn’t see a man dressed as a woman. I saw a soul stripping away its ego, its gender, and its identity to become one with the Divine.
How This Trip Shaped My Lens
I was young in my career when I visited Nandgaon. I went there looking for “content”—colorful frames, slow-motion gulal throws, and viral reels.
But standing amidst that riot of pink and yellow, watching sticks rain down on shields and men dance with the grace of gopis, I realized something that defines my work as @flybydreamer today:
A camera captures light, but an artist captures energy.
I stopped trying to “frame” the perfect shot and started trying to feel the vibration of the place. That shift—from looking to feeling—was my true initiation into cinematography.
To my fellow travelers and creators: If you ever find yourself in Nandgaon during Holi, put your camera down for a moment. Close your eyes. And listen to the chaos. You might just hear the flute of Krishna calling you home.